Canadians solemnly gather to Remember to forget Soldiers of Colour

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HALIFAX – A light drizzle accompanied a sacred gathering at the Grand Parade cenotaph, today, as a moment of silence highlighted the nation’s annual service to remember the lives of the White men, and only the White men, who made the ultimate sacrifice in the cause of freedom.

The solemn tradition was somewhat more somber, this time, however, as those in attendance expressed their fear that, despite the best efforts of educators and the media, there might come a time when the general public might actually cease to forget that the conflicts, which spanned multiple continents, and directly involved imperial nations with colonial outposts in every corner of the world, included people with dark skin risking their lives along with the pale-faced heroes they had gathered to honour.

The concerns were echoed by memorial attendee Emma Carrington. “I live in Edmonton, but my great grandfather left for Europe from this very city, so I travel here every year to make sure I properly forget”. She continued “But, this time the inflight entertainment included a 12 minute short about Force 136. It was shameful!”.

Ms. Carrington wasn’t alone. Sikh Italian Campaign-veteran Sukhpreet Dhillon was similarly worried. “I lost a lot of friends in those days,” he said, “and usually I can do a pretty good job of being a good Canadian and acting like they never existed, but it’s getting tougher” he noted. “It’s hardest on miserable, damp, days like today. I’ll wake up in the morning having forgotten it all, but the rain always makes my knee act up from the shrapnel I took at Monte Cassino”.

“I’m not without hope, though,” he continued. “I’m 98-years-old, so it’s not like people will be forced to accept my presence much longer”.

Toronto resident Aaron Cheng found himself wistful for the days when service members like himself threw themselves in harm’s way to ensure the freedom of the people who had denied them their own. “I have to say the best years of my life were those beautiful three I spent after I returned home from Burma, and never once was burdened by the idea of filling a ballot box”, he explained. “But now? Here I am with Kristyn Wong-Tam as my MPP and I’m thinking ‘What was it all even not-for?'”.

Not in attendance was West Indian RAF Serviceman Eric Cooke. “I was worried I’d be able to attend and shatter someone’s image of all World War II veterans looking like Old Captain America. But, fortunately, I had to bail out my grandson for driving with his side mirror slightly askew”.

Hoping to further the cause, Mr. Cooke offered further tips on how Canadians can pretend that people like him didn’t exist. “First of all, absolutely refuse to do any math. Like, if you consider that Japan invaded China two years before the start of hostilities in Europe, and the United didn’t enter until 1941, the logical part of your brain might think that victory in the Pacific Theatre wasn’t entirely due to the actions of brave, noble, White men”.

“Furthermore, you’re want to feed yourself a steady diet of Twitter and YouTube videos of Conservative Party voters trumpeting their ancestors’ service. Also make sure you try to stick in a health dose of old clips from Coach’s Corner, particularly the ones where he proudly talks about his Irish heritage. Ireland fought in World War II, right?”

Still, the struggle to completely obfuscate the sacrifices of the melanin-abundant remains a difficult one, Mr Dhillon acknowledged. “One thing I’ll never forget are the, angry, steel-blue eyes of that 18-year-old boy.. in the Legion hall, yelling at me to take off my turban”.

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