WASHINGTON, DC – With major news outlets calling the 2024 United States Presidential Election in favour of Donald Trump, scores of White women are condemning the election of a man for whom a majority of them voted.
“I’m disgusted!” raged self-proclaimed feminist Carrie Ellington. “This is just another example of the crippling yolk under which Men make us suffer! It’s all their fault! It’s men who voted for that scumbag! We women didn’t! Just look at the numbers! The gender numbers, I mean, don’t look any deeper than that, it’s just a waste of time”.
Exit polling suggests that a solid majority of White women, who represent the single largest voting block in the country, had voted for Trump, despite many pundits speculating that sentiment would turn against the former President out of concerns over abortion legislation.
Margaret Walling of Philadelphia expressed confusion at the numbers. “I don’t get it. The statistics have to be wrong. I don’t understand why so many White women would vote against body autonomy and for someone who leverages such hateful rhetoric. I mean, it’s not like we voted for the Republicans in all but two elections in the last 70+ years, right?”
Pausing a moment to collect her thoughts, Ms. Walling continued “Whatever the reason, it is important to remember that this is entirely the fault of White men, and we shoulder absolutely none of the blame”.
Walling’s opinions were echoed by Rutgers University student Tabitha MacAllister of Rutger’s university. “People who pointing at White women are missing the point entirely. I’m a University-educated White woman, and we voted for Harris. I don’t think it’s fair to lump me in with the voting habits of total strangers.. or my mom, sister, best friend, and two out of three my aunts”.
In a related story, seriously, Latino men, too?! What the fuck is going on?!
