Tag: NHL

Debate genius trounces all comers with well-timed salvo of “He hasn’t won the Cup!”

DARTMOUTH - An excited mass of reporters crowded into a small conference room, this morning, to get a chance to speak with Arnold Morris,...

Leafs brass promises to address team’s problems by trading away more first round picks

TORONTO - Following another tough elimination early in the Stanley Cup playoffs, Maple Leafs executives have stated that they intend to improve the club’s...

Matthews prepares for playoffs by failing to score important goal

TORONTO - After failing to reach the magical 70-goal plateau, Maple Leafs centre Auston Matthews explained that his inability to score the milestone marker...

Media buzzing after hockey player scores lacrosse-style goal for ten-billionth time

BOSTON - Hockey media was full of excited chatter, yesterday, after Hurricanes forward Andrei Svechnikov did the unthinkable and scored the rare lacrosse-style goal,...

Women’s Basketball called ‘pretend’ sport by guy who pretended to be a Top-2 draft pick

OTTAWA - Sports media was abuzz, today, after the highly-rated Women's March Madness Tournament was labelled "pretend" by Bobby Ryan, a former NHL player...

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Canadians hopeful boring PM means Americans will go back to not knowing anything about them

OTTAWA - After Monday's election saw the affirmation of...

Raptors blame poor season on “Brett”

TORONTO - As players for the Toronto Raptors cleared...

NHL insists Patel “just a hockey guy” in the same way that Palin “just a hockey mom”

NEW YORK CITY - After Kash Patel featured prominently...

Liberal hockey fan insists he never liked Gretzky

HALIFAX - In the midst of Wayne Gretzky facing...