HALIFAX – With, what meteorologists have predicted to be, an extremely-active hurricane season on the horizon, Cole Harbour resident, Meredith Lomax, is insisting that she will definitely buy a generator this year.
“I know I’ve said this before,” she explained, “but this is it, my mind is made up, I am definitely going to do it. I’m positive, no turning back now, no excuses. Seriously, it would be stupid not to, I mean it”.
According to Ms. Lomax, her commitment to make the investment is different than previous years when she floated the idea. “Okay, look, I know I said it during Juan. While I was eating a can of Campbell’s Chunky in pitch-darkness for the sixth day in a row, it did occur to me that there was a way to avoid this. But, then the power came on few days later, and I figured I was just letting the stress get to me. I mean, Juan was a once-in-a-century storm, right?”.
“Of course, then Noel rolled around and I thought ‘these are getting a lot more frequent, maybe it’s time to bite the bullet’, but the power wasn’t out nearly as long, and all I had to do was replace four-hundred-dollars-worth of food from my fridge. So I figured, maybe the real problem was that I bought too many groceries? If anything it was a good thing, it would teach me fiscal responsibility!”.
Meredith went on to say that she made up her mind Dorian. “After ‘The crane incident’ I knew it was time. I was getting one. But, when I started to look up products, I learned there were so many different kinds! There were classic generators, but there were also ‘battery backups’. Also, do I want a built-in generator or a portable one? Solar or gas? It was all so overwhelming, I thought it was best to sit on it for a while”.
“I mean, it took me six false-starts before I finally got a heat pump, so, I was making good progress”.
“Then came Fiona,” said Meredith, “and I’d had enough! I was doing it. I made up my mind. I was getting a generator, and it was going to be gas-powered. Nothing was stopping me. But, I was going to have to adjust the electrical panelling in my house, which felt like a lot, and it had been a while since Dorian, so I figured I had a few years of runway before the next one. It was probably best to marinate”.
“Of course, it wasn’t a few years. Lee hit. So I hitched up my pants, got an estimate for the electrical work, and picked out my preferred model. Everything was set, but, it was September, fall was coming, the storms were bound to be a lot less severe, I had time”.
“But here I am! I’m ready, now!” Lomax exclaimed. “I just need to get a new estimate because the last one expired. Also, I need to make sure I have a place to store it when I don’t need it. And, I’d probably want a secure locking mechanism, I mean, thieves will take anything not nailed down, y’know? And the prices, they’re so high! Perhaps I should wait a while to see if inflation cools off? Gosh, this is starting to make me anxious, maybe I should sleep on it”.
In a related story, Nova Scotia Power has announced that, moving forward, all costumers will be subjected to a $500 ‘buying a generator’ surcharge on their next bill.
